After 21 years of marriage and 2 beautiful kids, a very close friend of mine was told by her husband that he wanted a divorce. She had basically been the "good" wife catering to his needs , home and children while pursuing her own career. In the midst of being the perfect wife, mother, homemaker she never found herself. During this nasty process, her days were filled with questions of self doubt and many tears:
What did I do wrong?
Maybe if I....
Who's going to want me?
How am I going to survive without him?
What's wrong with me?
We all go through this whether it's a divorce or a long term relationship. We doubt ourselves and somehow blame US for the reason of the breakup. When it's simply the fact that one or both in the relationship stopped loving. I've learned that in any relationship, it takes both parties to work on keeping the love alive and it's not an easy task. There are no "fairytale" version .
During the process, she felt like she was in limbo waiting for the final papers to arrive. I invited her to go on hikes with me to get her mind off the stress and be in a different environment. After a few months she noticed that she was loosing some weight and started to feel good .... her self esteem was coming back.
On one of our recent hikes, we stopped to catch our breath and I noticed a good looking man walking up to our spot, hoping he would take a breather too. Hiker Larry introduced himself and joined us for the duration of the hike. He said he has seen us a few times and mentioned to my friend that hiking suits her because she looks great! He wanted to approach us and introduce himself sooner but it seemed that we were too focused on our conversations. I gave her the knowing look that Hiker Larry was clearly not into me but with HER!
As we headed back to our car, she was beaming. A good looking man had paid attention to her and made her laugh.
I said "Don't surprised if Hiker Larry joins us next week. Are you OK with that?"
Her response, "HELL YEAH!!!"
Thank You Hiker Larry!
xxoo- The Juggler